Restoration

Yesterday, Husband and I made an up and back trip to Anchorage to drop Luke off at the airport.  For those of you who don't live in Alaska, it takes 12 hours round-trip.  And, round-trip is what we did!  We left at 2am night before last.  Luke flew out at 9:30am, we did MINIMAL shopping (still paying two mortgages) and headed home.  We got home at 5 pm last night.  Talk about a tired Mommy and Daddy!  Thankfully, the children were quick to go to bed last night and both Husband and I were asleep by 9pm.

When you travel that far you get a lot of time to think!

While  I was waiting at the airport for Luke's flight to take off I was texting with Sydney.  (Who's in Long Beach, WA visiting my family right now)  She was just heading out to see the King Tut exhibit in Seattle.  She also got to go to Pike's Place and otherwise do fun, touristy things.  I'm a bit jealous.  ;) 

While I was texting with her I noticed that I receive an OVERWHELMINGLY larger number of texts from her than from anyone else......and not one of them says. "I hate you!"  LOL  Do you know how much that blesses me?  That my 17 year old is my friend?  That she still calls me "Mommy"?  That when she reads something that she's not sure about she comes to me and asks what I think?  (Most recently regarding some theology).

Statistically though, it SO could have be different for both Sydney and me. 

I am a Teen Mom, or, at least I used to be.  Now I'm a mom of a teen  (or 3)! ;)

I've been walking this road for 17 years now and the farther away I get from that 15 year old pregnant girl the clearer the bigger picture gets.  I can see all the ways God's hand has been there.  All the things He's  restored and all the prayers that have been answered.

This is one of my favorite songs of all time.  I love music that tells a story and....little known fact about me....I love old-school rap.  It's OK, you don't have to like it too...we can still be friends.  Anyway, here's a link to it on youtube.  If you can't stomach the rap part of it I'll post some of the lyrics for you!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HJ1DHhobVVg

"Irene"

Hush little baby baby don't you cry
Daddy's gonna sing you a lullaby
Everything's gonna be alright
The Lord's gonna answer your prayer tonight
Hush little baby don't you cry
Daddy's gonna sing you a lullaby
Everything's gonna be alright
The Lord's gonna answer your prayer

Last night you had a dream you was the homecoming queen
Today you're 18, happy birthday Irene
School you had to drop out to raise your little child
Don't seem to be anyone around
You've got to reach up to touch rock bottom
The powers that be keep you downtrodden
Daughter of Zion, I heard your prayer
Just cast your cares and please beware of snakes
They come in all shapes and sizes
Tempt you, put scales on your eyelids
Don't waste your sorrows
They'll give you strength tomorrow
Your Calvary's about to come so
Keep your head up, don't you ever let up
This storm will pass you'll be ready for the next one

Hey little girl with the pressures of the world on your shoulders
Don't say that it's over
I heard your prayers, just cast your cares
And I'll be there so don't you fear

[CHORUS]

Irene I carried you when you was too weak to walk
I took to you when you gave your heart to God
Faithful and true, that's what I'll always be to you
Believe in you, believe in Me and these mountains have to move
You have dreams and aspirations
I knew you before creation
Your foundation's solid
I will give you a palace, restore your soul
You'll be up for any challenge
Many storms are on the way better sharpen your faith
Count the cost, take up your cross
And wear it every day
Rest in Me and I will give you strength
Blessed is she, Irene who seeks my face

[CHORUS]

Father I'm stronger than when I first believed

OK, I had a hard time choosing so I just posted the whole song.  I did have a support system but I also had dreams and aspirations.  I went to school and worked.  Honestly, Sydney didn't get much of my time those first couple years.  I was young.  I was selfish.  I wasn't necessarily a BAD mom.  I just did the things that I thought moms did however misguided those perceptions were.  And you know what?  God still blessed that!  He still blessed that floundering, selfish, scared girl.  I turned my heart toward Him....over time....and He used that to turn my heart toward my home.  My children.  My husband.  He answered my cries.  He knew what I needed when I didn't even know what I needed.

And he knew what Sydney needed.  He has sent her a Daddy that adores her....and she adores him.  They're best friends.  There's not a single drop of his blood running through her veins but they are 100% father and daughter.  She's never had one of those "REAL" dad identity problems.  She has a dad who has filled the hole that should have been in her heart. 

So what's the point in all this?

I'm just amazed to look back and see all the blessings God has given me.  Me.  That naive girl.  He didn't come after me with a stick or condemn me.  He just loved me.  Blessed me gently....over time and watched me bloom under His loving parenthood.  And Sydney too....she had every right to be a "troubled" child.  People even EXPECTED it!  But look at her!  So beautiful on the inside and outside!  THAT is the work of a loving God.  Not a hateful taskmaster!

Random Thoughts and Happenings.....

Libby Jane escaped from her crib for the first time today.....She's 16 1/2 months old.  Is that supposed to happen already?

James Michael and Iz helped me make rhubarb crisp today.  It started when James asked me to go on a walk with him.  His request was immediately followed by adorable, pleading eyes and "Please say YES".  How could I say no?  Especially when he's been especially Dennis the Menace/Tigger-ish lately.  I know all he did was ask me to go for a walk, but what I heard was "Mommy, you've been so sick, I've missed you.  I need your attention."  We held hands as we walked to the top of the driveway and back (We don't live in the city...it's a long driveway)  He wanted to go throw rocks over a valley near our house but I told him I didn't think I could make it that far.  He offered to carry me. 

On the way home we stopped at the garden box and decided to harvest the rhubarb.  He was so excited that I let him do ALL the cutting!  We fed the leaves to the chickens and made our way to the house, stopping to show Daddy our bountiful harvest.  Israel wanted to get in on the action too and was a little put out that I was making him put clothes on and wash his hands before helping.  He's been practicing standing up while peeing and had "mis-calculated" a while before and was hence, running around naked.  He was kind enough to take his clothing to the dirty laundry for me.

Tonight, while James and Iz were going potty before bed I heard a loud sound (like someone dropping a toilet seat) and then I heard James say, "Ow...that really hurt.  Israel, will you pray for me so I can get better?"  And Israel quoted his patented bedtime prayer.  It was so sweet.

I've been sick.  A lot sick.  I never get sick.  I'm the one who takes care of everyone else when THEY'RE sick.  How did this happen?  On Sunday I took a 7 hour nap.  Joslyn has been praying for me at every meal and at bedtime.  The Bigs have been so great to help me out but you can tell by attitudes that Mommy just hasn't been all there.  Tensions are running high.  I'm hoping tomorrow I'll be back at it again.  There's two weeks worth of laundry that needs folding!! 

Oh, and one of my freezers died today so I had to transfer everything to the other freezer.  Good thing we are at the VERY END of the cow we bought or it wouldn't have all fit!

And with that, Friends, I am off to bed.

P.S.  I want to add that today someone asked when I'm due and I got to say, "Next month".  Do you have any idea how awesome that is?  I've been dreaming of this day.  "Next month" sounds so much sooner than "6 weeks", don't you think?